i want to poke someone's eyes out and seeing as how big is the only person i spend time with, it will most likely be his. i feel like i am on a disneyland track through southeast asia. a track that has been done before. like a million times. i hate that he's been to all of these places before. and i'm getting frustrated that we never step away from "big's routine guide through asia".

bangkok-bella bella guest house. koh phangon-haad yuan; bamboo hut. siem reap-green town guest house. phnom penh-okay guesthouse. pai-ben's place.

it's just all been done before and hate wondering how many other women he's already taken to all of these places. i crave something new. leave the safety and comforts of constantly knowing what to expect. is he trying to relive good experiences/memories with me? i want to be unique. not just another chick that he's traveled in southeast asia with. and i want him to be consumed with me to the point where every single reference he makes no longer pertains to ex-girlfriends.

zoe zoe zoe. kristin kristin kristin. margaret margaret margaret. lisa lisa lisa. please shut the fuck up.

i'm sure you had fun times and that's great, but i really don't want to hear about your ex-girlfriends daily. i have ex stories too. i guess i'm just not inclined to incessantly bring them up. tell me stories about you; not stories about you with [girlfriend X #1, #2, etc.]. do you constantly talk about them, because you constantly think about them? hearing about them makes me think you're really not over it. and in that case, i'm just wasting my fucking time.

i'm insanely bratty today.